Sunday, March 7, 2010

So, are people really into this open relationship thing?

The famous comedian/actress Mo'Nique had admitted to an open relationship with her husband, Sidney Hicks. "Let me say this: I have not had sex outside my marriage with Sidney...Could Sid have sex outside of his marriage with me? Yes. That's not a deal-breaker. That's not something that would make us say, 'Pack your things and let's end the marriage.'" And, Will and Jada Smith have admitted to having an open relationship. This leads me to ask, "Is everybody doing it or is this just a celebrity trend?"

It's funny, what used to get a man hit upside the head with a cast iron skillet back in the day will now get him a free pass plus a kiss on the cheek. A friend and I were talking about how when we were in highschool, if a guy said, "Suck my d*#*," he'd better be ready to throw down 'cause them there were fighting words. But now, girls will gladly go to the restroom and do that plus more.

Listening to Michael Baisden, you can find yourself hearing all the crazy, freaky things that folks are doing these days. Swingers?! When has Black folks joined the Swingers bandwagon? I must have missed that memo. But, according to his viewers it has been going on for a long time. Swingers and now open relationships. What else? Or, what next?

I find it disgusting when a married man approaches me. What is in it for the single women? Sex? Is that all? Heck, that's the short end of the stick if you ask me. He is paying for his wife's bills and making sure the mortgage is being paid, but I'd get a night of sex that I'd have to stay on my knees and repent for later. Heck naw! Besides, the wife gets all the benefits...pension, health insurance, life insurance, social security, etc. But, what about the other woman he had the open relationship with? What benefit does she get besides a hot bed that would get cold after he showered and went back home?

And, what about diseases? Has anyone forgot about them? You can't look at anyone and tell if they have HIV, syphillis or chlamydia! What if he got so into it that he didn't wear protection and mistakenly took something home to his wife? This makes me think, if Sidney can go do whomever he wanted, then there is no limit to the sexual relationships that he could have, right? So, what if he was like Wilt Chamberlain and was buck wild, would that change things? Ugh, too many variables and way too many risks.

Naw, that is not for me. Besides, I wish a brotha would ask me to have an open relationship after all of these years of being single and hoping to find a mate? Man, is you crazy? I have to admit, I'd go ol' skool on him and reach for a pan and make him think about the words he just blurted out.



  1. We are living in a time when we have forgotten who we are. We have forgotten how many times we have jumped on the European bandwagon and how many times it has rotted us from the core. I hate the fact that we are always so happy to hold on to things that simply aren't a part of our culture. This is nasty and I would call the paramedics and the police if I was asked to do something like this. I would go in the police car and he would go with medic and you know I ain't even almost playin'

  2. Chile I agree with everything you said. But I think you misquoted the phrase, it's actually N&ggA, IS YOU CRAZY?!!!!!!!!!! Ok, I know you changed it for PC reasons, but some things to warrant stepping out of the PC box. On the real, these folks have lost their minds. I remember when it was a big deal for brothas and sistas to talk about oral sex. People might have been doing it, but no one wanted to admit it. Now everything has become fair game.

    We've taken assimilation too FAR! Remember Black folks didn't believe in plastic surgery? Those days seems long gone! Lil' Kim and Vivica A. Fox are leading the charge on this one. These were attractive women. Now they look like nightmares. Did anyone learn anything from the passing of Kanye's beloved Mother?

    Hollywood, of course, is another animal. But STILL! WAKE UP! I know it may seem like I have gone off on a tangent, but just stay with me. It all points to one thing really, lack of God and lack of self. Um, wait , is that two things? Well it can be considered one thing. God created us in His own image. We are the ONLY species that can own that right. So surely lack of God and lack of self is one in the same.

    We are lost souls, wandering around out here. Getting back to the “open relationships.” Yes I know, ABOUT TIME! Anyway, I spoke with my Mother about this topic earlier today. She finds it hard to believe that everyone is really subscribing to the club. She thinks that it’s more about acceptance. “I know he’s going to do it, so I might as well slap an “open relationship” tag on it so I can be ok.” Is this really what it is?! I’ve read a lot about these open seemingly relationships and inevitably in those situations folks get mad too. You can sleep with whomever you want, just not that person. Or you can sleep with whomever you want, just don’t fall in love. Just make sure you spend Christmas with me. Just make sure you don’t take her/him out of town. Just make sure you don’t kiss. Just make sure you don’t have oral sex. WTF?!(“f” = freak, ahem.) So open relationships have rules too? As my Goddaughter once said, “It all got so complicated.”

    Can we just go back to regular ole relationships that are SUPPOSED to be monogamous? Girl falls in love with her soul mate. Girl finds out soul mate cheated on her with another girl. Girl whoops soul mate’s a$$ & pours hot grits on his back, keys his car and calls other girl to say, “b5tch leave my man ALONE.” Soul mate calls other girl and says, “Um yeah my girl found out about us. It won’t be going down no mo’ between me & you.” First girl and soul mate live happily ever after…until he does it again. Strictly, old school love, baby. None of this open junk. Yeah!