Mother's Day...yep, like Ice Cube said, "Today was a good day"

Flashback: Mother's Day - two years ago.

The scenario - Dove away for the weekend because Mother's Day fell on her father's weekend.

Picture this: Dove - enjoying the beautiful day at dinner with her father, grandfather and celebrating the day with her grandmother. Me - church in the morning and yard work all day until 6 PM. (Well, yardwork until my neighbor said: "Give it a break! It's Mother's Day. If I was your age, I'd be out getting my groove back.")

Present: Mother's Day 2010.

The scenario - 7:45 am church service for me since Dove was away again since Mother's Day fell on her father's weekend yet another year. (Hey, we celebrate Mother's Day all of the time.)

But, there was something different this year  in the works for my special day - a date with "just a friend."

Yes, lately he has surprised me with his, uhm....well, I'm not sure how to describe it, but he has surprised me lately. Okay, he has admitted that he liked me, which was probably a huge thing for him to do. I guess I should have assumed he did but as the age ol' saying goes (when you assume you make an ass out of you and me)... And, I didn't want to make an ass out of myself. So, I never allowed my thoughts to go too far by over analyzing his actions. Besides, as I blogged in February, he always had a way to remind me that we were just "cool" and "just friends." No big deal.

However, a change has come about and I have to admit that I like the change. Our text conversations this week has been honest and revealing. He has definitely come through with helping to take care of things around my house. If I was talking to a girlfriend right now, I'd say: "And gurl, he even cleaned my gutters!" When "just a friend" told me that he wanted to take me to dinner for Mother's Day I was a little nervous. Why? I don't know!!!

Really, I don't know. I was making sure that I didn't read into any of the new revelations from him, but I think I was nervous that he actually put words to the secret thoughts. Now I'm accountable for my feelings. Do I like him back? If so, what do I do? You have to understand me, nothing can change for us because we're just friends. My heart and mind has been closed off to the notion of liking him and that can't change just because of a few words thrown about! We're friends and that's it. I can't be getting all gitty, girlish and highschoolish over him. That's not the basis of our friendship, trust me, I know these things. Yeah, he may like me and I might like him, but freedom is the issue in our lives right now.

Moving on, geesh! We had a wonderful dinner at the Epicentre. I love sushi and he decided to be open and try it (again). It was a wonderful meal, ambiance was a bit seductive (for Mother's Day), and he even had a bit of humor. This Mother's Day was a heck of a lot better than two years ago...and I have to thank my friend for spending it with me.

(Picture: hands of my "friend" ~ ooh, mysterious.)

Before our dinner, I spend a lovely lunch with my Granny at the lake. I packed fresh strawberries and pineapple, and we had blueberries, chips and Starbucks! We spent time talking, watching the geese and sharing laughs. It was a good day.

Okay, if you want to know if anything ever unfolds then you'll have to stay tuned...

PS...this blog DID NOT turn out the way I intended....oh dear, very little about my day. (sigh) Like Ice Cube said, "today was a good day."

Black Luv...

There is no secret that I would love to be in a love. No longer do I wish to settle with being just a "friend." I'm darn near 40 years old so when does a promotion come? Who wants that year after year without growth and progession? "Yeah, she's just my friend." Ugh, so many females I know are just the "friend".

But, this blog is not about that. It's about me reminding myself what I am waiting for...what I'm guarding my heart for. I'm talking about that Barack and Michelle Obama type of love. Where he still holds her hand, whisper in her ear and protects her. And, she stands behind him working towards his vision and while still keeping hers, supporting him and standing by him regardless of how much stress he may let slide into the bedroom. Even if there was an issue in their relationship, you'd never know it. That's what I'm talking about!

I'm talking about that Titus and Kesha type of love where she never saw limits to his person as he sat in his wheelchair, but only potential and purpose. He doesn't allow physical limits to lead him to a life of excuses, but works hard so that she can homeschool their children, he washes her head full of locs, practices patience as she committed precious time away from him to watch other children besides theirs, caters to her needs all while laughing as they grow closer as best friends. And she, honors him always, sends sweet messages through Facebook advertising her love for him, she allows him to be the man and the head of household and lovingly refers to him as "my husband" or "Big Daddy." That's the kind of love I'm talking about!

I'm talking about that Kami and Isayah kind of love. I love the fact that they have stickability through everything that comes their way. Yeah, it gets hard for them but they keep pushing and working together. I love that they are both creative, rooted, pray for eachother and pray together. They work together on projects yet work on their own...they are truly partners. Who doesn't want a partner in their relationship? A best friend to have their back? That is the kind of love that I'm talking about.

I want that type of love. Of course, I don't know what goes on behind closed doors, but I do know the integrity of these people, these couples and what they have is real. So real. Yeah, it may be work but they realize that it is not greener on the other side so they work together to keep it together.

Who says that Black love doesn't exist? All the good men are locked away in jail, dead or gay? Or, the older we get then there won't be any men left? Heck no, I don't subscribe to that. I can't. I don't want to live my forties alone or settle for half a man.

I have too many examples of good men, good women and true Black love.  Here are a few honorable mentions simply chosen because they don't keep their love hidden:

Chuck and Ava - Now, they really love each other and for a young couple, they have put in some years.They have two beautiful children, a son with autism. And, even though raising a child with autism is rough, they hold on and still find humor in their lives. Ava is always laughing. When I look at them it reminds me of a settled love. Not a bad settle, but the cozy, comfortable settled. They know one another and accepts everything each has to offer.

Dean and Tracey - He is a well sought after comedian and she is a professor. They have two beautiful girls and have been in love for ages!

Vincent and Keita - He is a well known DJ and she does it all. They promote the hottest parties in NY. I am sure they get both men and women throwing themselves at them, but they stand united. They love eachother so much that they look alike. One daughter and a baby on the way.

Ericka and Malik - she married a younger man and he honored her so much that he let some old habits go for the sake of their relationship.

(Ava and Chuck, Ericka and Malik)

I know so many other couples that I can't name them all. But, you get the picture...that's the love I'm talking about!

(Titus washed and now twisting Kesha's hair.)