Shake what your mama gave you!

Yep, I'll be doing just that. I MADE IT! Yes, I'm not only a certified Zumba instructor, but after two auditions, I am invited to be a Queen City Dancing Queen instructor. Yes!

As I walked into the first audition, two lead instructors and the owner sat behind a white folding table a la American Idol style. I thought, "Well, they've seen me for the past year and even seen me work it out on stage right beside them. I'll only be auditioning one or one and a half songs, tops." They had me do all three songs! I hooped a little bit as if there was a room full of participants and ended up sweating like a pig in a blanket! And afterwards, I had an interview. Whew, this thing was harder than getting a job with my previous employer, BOA.

Then, the audition in front of a class. Yep, even with the judges sitting right front (a little to the side) of the stage. Talk about nerve-wracking! And, I was the last person to audition after a 2-hour double header. I was so anxious that I couldn't even concentrate on all the others before me. It was wild because I couldn't even remember the routine!

But, I shook off all of the nervousness and kept it moving!

And, after all of this...I made it! I put my mind to it and did it!

It's On!!!

Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear

What could I do if it were not for fear?

Would I climb the highest mountain

or swim across the sea?

I have desires in my heart to try, oh,

so many things

To live life to the fullest and not

just in my dreams.

Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear

Woulda', coulda', shoulda' is our worst enemies

But mark my words this very day that

I will, I'll try and I must will

definitely lead my way.

I just made that up. :)

Auditions to teach with Queen City Dancing Queen was this week. I built all this nervous energy inside of me for no reason. I could do this! I've been dancing my heart out for the past year several times a week. But, fear was trying to paralyze me and honestly, I had nothing to fear (but fear itself and that's the truth.)

After my private audition on Monday, all auditionees were going to have to audition in front of a live class on Friday. We all would see who our competitors were. Although I believe that there is no competition in the spiritual world, what is meant for you will be for you. Being a spiritual person, I truly believe that if it is meant for you then forces will align correctly to make things work in your favor. Hmph! And, even while knowing this in my heart, I had the nerve to allow trepidations to creap in my spirit.

Well, enough of that. I did it! I auditioned and I rocked it! I danced to Boro Boro (a bhangra song) and Church by T-Pain. And, I took 'em to church as I pumped, jumped, shook my booty and all that! (See my blog about the Alvin Ailey dancers).

Everyone will know by April 30th if they're accepted in the instructor training program for QCDC. Stay tuned.

I'm so tired...

Why do I, year after year, wait until the last minute to work on my taxes?! I hate this procrastination thing I have going on. My eyes are burning, my head is pounding and it's only been 17 minutes into the process! No, just kidding, it's been more like an hour, but still... This kind of paperwork is not for creative souls.

So, I'll be retiring soon. I'm tired.

Oh yeah, I talked to my mom today. She's excited because we're going on a cruise in the fall - me, her and Dove. I'm giddy, too. I've purchased two tankini's, not quite ready for a bikini. I hope we can go parasailing and snorkeling on our trip. Anyway, she wants to get her navel pierced. Ha! That would be something to see. She's twice a grandmother and going to get her belly-button pierced - go head! Hmmm...maybe I should one up her? I'll get my navel pierced and another tattoo. Hmmm...naw, just kidding. I'm not that competitive.

Yesterday, I was a tad bit too competitive as I went to Queen City Dancing Queen's "Make It A Party" Dance workshop. All those who wanted to be a better instructor or even audition to be an instructor with QCDC attended (as well as those who just wanted to attend). I wanted to show my stuff and each time I tried to shine, I messed up. Hilarious! I started on the wrong foot, mirrored incorrectly, etc. As sorors said when we pledged back in college, "Oh, you're trying to be like Windex and shine." Well folks, yesterday I streaked! Too funny...

Well, my eyes are burning and I'm tired so PEACE!

The Alvin Ailey Dance Company

As I blogged previously, I went out with just a friend to see the internationally acclaimed dance company. Sitting comfortably in my seat, I watched the lean muscled bodies move and intertwine with each other. "Dancers have horrible feet, but great bodies," I thought as I recalled how three dancers who attended the Alvin Ailey Dance School lived above us three actress in the 3-story Brownstone in Brooklyn.

My mind wandered on how the individual dancers decided to dance as a profession? Only now that I'm in to physical fitness that I pay attention to how their profession shaped the way they walk and move elegantly. I wondered if my parents would have invested time and exposed me to different activities in my youth then how my life would have been different. What if they got me into dance? Would I be a dancer now?

I quickly dismissed the thought because I was a shy, chunky kid and would have never felt comfortable dancing around in a leotard (besides that one time in the privacy of my room where I pranced around in one after putting tissue in my bra for fake nipples- I wanted to be like Thelma from Good Times). I knew that I would have been teased for being fat, if anything. One childhood memory flashed of how I found myself on a balance beam where a gymnastics team practiced and I overheard the coach talk about how he was surprised that someone so fat could even climb up on the beam. I quickly jumped down and became invisible again. And, another time when my cousins and I created a dance routine and performed for the family. My aunt (my mom's oldest sister) said, "You keep on shaking like that then you'll be able to shake some of that fat right off of you."

Me, fat. Yep, as my Grandpa (see pic) used to say, "short, fat and squatty and ain't got no body." That was me. I envied those bodies on the stage as they moved around effortlessly. Could I do that? I mean...what about now that I am fearless about dancing in front of other people? I was tickled as one last memory popped into my head. When I was about 13, my mom had a friend who knew someone who danced. The lady took me to see the Alvin Ailey Dance Company. Afterwards, we went to a party where all the dancers were gathered and she introduced me around. I was so excited, but embarrassed at my size while in the midst of so much beauty. I didn't see myself as beautiful so I pressed myself in the wall and tried to become invisible. I spent the night with the lady and the next morning I accompanied her to a dance workshop that they did for dancers. I watched in awe at how they were able to leap high, land low, twist and turn all about.

If I were skinnier, would I have had the audacity to believe in myself to dance freely? Maybe...maybe not. A greater thought is...how all of those things shaped me to be who I am now. And more importantly, I've learned to expose my daughter while exposing myself to many opportunities and life experiences. That way, I can shape who I will continue to grow to be as well as the young woman who will grow old to be my legacy.

I exhaled slowy and realized that I am do exactly what I wished to do. As I dance, move and shake in Zumba. In that workout class, I am onstage and I perform as I dance. I have erased all of those old memories and am replacing them with new ones.

Last Saturday I was living the life...

and this Saturday was a bust. Last Saturday I spent my day sweating, gyrating, and jammin' as I moved my body to every Merengue, Salsa, Cumbia and Reggaeton beat. From 8:30 am to 5 PM, I was learning the moves and working hard to become a Zumba Certified Instructor! And I made it. I left the gym where training was held feeling exhausted, drenched, and accomplished.

Saturday evening, I spent the night with my girls Arlena and Glenda and got excited as a young man served us at Chili's. Yeah, I blogged about his nice Levi's...roar (sound of my cougar growl). Then we mosied over the Play Date and had a ball with folks our age as we let playing some good ol' fashioned games.

I was aroused with my singleness. Now, I have a free weekend without my daughter and everyone is either busy or laying back with their children. Ugh! This is killing me. Where is here to go this weekend? I don't want to go to a club. Yuk!

I guess this cougar will have to rest this weekend. Me and Tracey Ullman (on Showtime) will have a date, I haven't seen her in a while. She may inspire some great ideas for my one-woman shows.

The Good News and the Bad...

While visiting a classroom in an elementary school yesterday, I was approached by one of the teachers. She said, "Oh, you're a visiting artist? I thought you were one of the highschool students from Northwestern." She's my best friend now. A highschool student? Aww, such flattery. That made my day! Of course, she could be one of those types of people who are horrible at guessing ages, but I don't care...I'll take the compliment!

The good news...I don't look my age.

The bad news...the grant has run out on my teaching artist gig.

Yep, during our meeting yesterday, we were informed of the grant being completed after this year. Soooo, where does that leave us teaching artists? They began talking about options, but of course, there were no guarantees of anything. Soooo, yep... good-bye to my elementary school residencies.

Oh...more good news...I am officially a certified Zumba instructor!!! Yes!

Spread the sunshine!